Holy Mother of Debra (Chapter 5)

One day, Debra was alone in her room again, trying to meditate on her yoga mat. Her cassette player was playing a different tape but with the same voice and similar music. She was sitting down with her legs crossed, eyes closed and her hands in a pinching gesture as the backs of them were on her knees. She listened to the tape and began responding to it like she did days before.
"You are way up in the blue sky, sitting on a fluffy cloud," said Jimmy, the voice on the tape.
"I am way up in the blue sky, sitting on a fluffy cloud."
"Sitting on that cloud is like sitting on the insides of a pillow."
"Sitting on that cloud is like sitting on the insides of a pillow."
"The sun is shining on your face but not too bright."
"Ha, I don't think you'd let the sun blind me, Jimmy."
"The sun is giving you warmth and providing you light."
"Oh, I think it's just the magic of your voice."
"Up on your cloud, you are the ruler of the universe."
"I am the ruler of the universe. Jimmy, you flatter me. You so fine."
In the midst of her meditation, Debra heard a knock on her bedroom door.
"Don't come in. I have company."
Debra's mother opened the door and stuck her head inside the room.
Debra opened her eyes and looked at her mother. "I said don't come in."
"I'm halfway in," said her mom. She stepped into the bedroom. "Now I'm in. I don't see no company in here."
"Now you're getting slowly drenched by the light rain falling from the sky," said Jimmy.
"Oh, I guess you do have company here. I remember Jimmy."
"What are you doing here?" Debra asked nicely, getting up and facing her mom.
"I got you peanuts." Debra's mother reached down her tight sweater and pulled out a little, long bag of sliced nuts.
Debra lightly took the bag out of her hands. "Gee, your breasts kept them nice and warm."
"Why do you gotta sound sarcastic?"
"I can't help it sometimes. I get it from Skye."
"Listen, I may have told you about my cancer scare at the wrong time."
"I feel like any time would be the wrong time."
"That's why I didn't want to say anything."
"Listen, before you say you're sorry, I gotta say that I'm sorry. I kinda handled the news the wrong way. I don't want it to be cancer. But I was really mad at you."
"I understand. I'm not mad at you for being mad. You wanted the truth so I gave you the truth."
"That's the thing: the truth can hurt sometimes. It hurts me that when you were told that you might have cancer, you realized that you needed to spend more time with your kids."
"Yes, I made a realization. But isn't that good? I want to see my kids before I die."
"But what if you don't die? What if you didn't even have this scare? You wouldn't even be here."
"That's not true."
"Yes, it is. You only see me and Leroy once a week and if not that, once every two weeks. Even when you have more time than you usually do, you never come over or call us. Just admit it: you don't want to spend time with us."
"If I admit that, it would be a lie. Of course I want to spend time with you and Leroy. I don't know, I guess that after the divorce, I wanted to focus on me more. I wanted to give myself the love that your father didn't want to give me. Not that I'm blaming your dad; don't look at your dad a different way. I just got more self-absorbed and without realizing it, I've been spending more time with myself than with my kids. I'm sorry, Debra. I love you and your brother to death. I never want to hurt you on purpose. I'm really sorry."
"I forgive you. But if you're going to spend time with us, shouldn't we do something that we all want to do?"
"You told me once that you wanted a manicure."
"Yeah but I said that because my nails were looking bad at the time. I just needed them filed down, that's all."
Debra's mother giggled. "Fine, we'll all do something that we want to do every day."
"Every day? Mother, no offense but I don't want to be with you every day."
"You can't be that mad at me."
"No, I meant that we're polar opposites. The things you want to do, I don't want to do. And the things I want to do, you won't want to do."
"Well, shoot, what do you want to do?"
"I think we should take a yoga class."
"Ain't gonna happen."
"See? I like peace and quiet and you... don't. We should definitely spend time together, just not every day. You should get your nails and hair 'did' while I practice some meditation."
"You actually like meditating and sitting on the floor? With Jimmy?"
"'Yep-suru'. I have so much fun finding my inner galaxy."
"I never understood why you talk like that."
"It's just a language that parents don't understand."
"Whatever. So are we good?"
Debra responded by giving her mom a hug, which she reciprocated.
"Aw, mom," said Debra while letting go. "You're gonna be fine. I know it."
"Thanks, sweetie. Should I leave you the heck alone now?"
"Yes, leave me the heck alone."
The women laughed at the same time.
"Alright, I'll leave you alone with 'Jimmy'," said the mother.
"Thank you."
"Pretend that you're soaring through the air unclothed like a bird," uttered Jimmy.
"Hey, you better watch your mouth, Jimmy," Debra's mom said to the cassette player.