"Really, bro?" DeMarcus asked.
"It soothes me," Randall responded.
He played another song, which was also classical music, this time more gleeful.
"It puts me in a good mood," commented Randall.
"It obviously doesn't work."
DeMarcus played another song, which was baroque pop, heavy with violins.
"More classical music?" he asked.
"That's the Verve."
"Well, the Verve don't cut it. I'm gonna find us a song."
DeMarcus searched up a song and started playing it. He sat the phone down on the dining table. DeMarcus turned up the volume, allowing the guys to hear the electronic hip-hop song.
That girl is a real crowd pleaser
Small world, all her friends know of me
Young bull livin' like an old geezer
Quick release the cash, watch it fall slowly
All the guys danced to the song in their own ways. First, they were dancing by themselves. Then they began dancing together. Some of them were awkward dancers. The rest of them did not care; they were way into the song. Either way, they were all having the times of their lives.
When the song was over, Calvin gestured to Jeffrey. He walked over to him.
"What's up?" Jeffrey asked.
"I want to show you something," Calvin responded.
"I'm not gay, dude."
"Just come here." Calvin grasped Jeffrey's wrist and led him out of the living room into Madeline's room.
Randall sat down at the dining table and picked up one of Kyle's photographs. He looked at Kyle and asked him, "Do you have a pen?"
"Yep," Kyle answered. He reached it his pocket and pulled out a pen. He handed it to Randall.
"Thank you."
"That's the first time I heard you say, 'Thank you'."
"Yeah, shut up." Randall began writing on the photo.
"You know, you're not so bad, Kyle," admitted DeMarcus.
"You're not so bad yourself, DeMarcus," shared Kyle.
"Give me a hug, man." DeMarcus opened his arms with Kyle coming in and embracing him.
Then the door opened. Madeline came in along with the girls whose arms were full of shopping bags. They witnessed what was going on.
"Oh, no, they're killing each other!" Lizzie shouted.
"I'll save you, Kyle!" Debra said, running towards the boys.
She broke up the hug and chopped DeMarcus on his shoulder, knocking him out. He laid on the floor on his back with his arms and legs out.
"Hey, hey, Debra!" said Kyle. "What are you doing?"
"Uh, saving you," responded Debra.
"He wasn't hurting me, Debra. He was hugging me."
"Hugging you? Oh, that's so sweet."
Lizzie walked over to DeMarcus and crouched over him. "Babe?" she said, slapping him on the cheek. He would not wake up. "Babe? Babe? Babe?"
"Babe's dead, Lizzie," said Skye.
"Speaking of dead, I found Sean knocked out outside," mentioned Madeline. "He was actually breathing but do you know what happened to him?"
Kyle's forehead wrinkled. "No, not at all."
"I was thinking about calling an ambulance, but then I was like, 'Nah.'"
"You hit his pressure point, didn't you?" Debra whispered to Kyle.
"Yeah," he whispered back.
"I'm not mad at you."
"You shouldn't. You just did the same thing to DeMarcus."
"Where's Jeffrey?" asked Skye.
He came into the living room, looking way different. He traded his black and white clothing for an all black outfit, involving a leather jacket and boots. He was missing his beanie and his jet black hair was slicked back. Also, his big glasses were replaced with sheer, black sunglasses. Skye dropped her jaw after taking a look at him.
"Oh, my God," Madeline said, rolling her eyes.
"Oh, my God," said Skye, smiling. "You look... different."
"Thanks," Jeffrey said in an Irish accent, walking towards his girlfriend. "I know."
"Lose the accent," demanded Madeline.
"Okay," Jeffrey said in his regular voice.
"Jeffrey, what happened to you?" asked Skye.
"I just thought it was time for a change, you know? I mean, I'm not gonna dress like this every day but I want you to have this."
"Okay. You want to get out of here?"
"Yes, I do."
Skye took Jeffrey by the hand and pulled him out of the condo.
"She's gonna let him touch her titties tonight," said Andrea. "Alright, Randall, you ready to go?"
Randall put the pen down. "Yes, sweetie."
"I love it when you call me sweetie."
"I'm not gonna call you sweetie every day." He got up and walked towards his girlfriend.
"Yes, you are."
"Maybe if I had a black beatle, you wouldn't care."
"What is that supposed to mean?"
Randall walked out the door with Andrea following. Meanwhile, Calvin came back into the living room. He walked towards Madeline when he saw her.
"Hey, babe," he said.
"Hey," she responded.
He looked at DeMarcus, who was still on the floor with Lizzie crouched over him. "What is DeMarcus doing on the floor?"
"Just chilling. What did you do to Jeffrey?"
"Oh, I 'gay-dified' him. It was the least I could do."
"There's nothing gay about Bono."
"I know."
"Besides, you can't be gay because you're with me."
"I know." Calvin pecked Madeline on the lips.
"Guys, I'm gonna take DeMarcus home," said Lizzie, lifting him up. She put his arm around her shoulders and held tightly to his hand. "He loves my driving anyway."
"See you!" said Debra, waving at her.
Lizzie effortlessly dragged DeMarcus' body out of the condo.
"Yeah, I gotta go, too," said Calvin. "They're playing Priscilla, Queen of the Desert on the Indie Channel at five and I can't miss it."
"Hey, dude," called Kyle.
Calvin approached him. Kyle put his hand on the back of Calvin's head and pressed his forehead with his.
"Stay you," Kyle said.
"Thanks, man."
Calvin released himself from Kyle and gave Madeline another kiss. "I'll see you later, okay?"
"Okay," Madeline said with a smile.
Calvin waved at Kyle before leaving. Kyle waved back.
"So, Hillary, I'm just gonna go," he said. "But it was nice staying at your condo for a few hours. It's pretty sweet."
"I know, hobo," said Madeline, putting her hands on her hips.
"Whatever. Let's go, Debbie."
With their arms around each other, Kyle and Debra proceeded to walk out the door.
"See you, Maddie!" said Debra.
Madeline walked over to the table. "See you," she said. "Hey, wait. Wait!"
The couple went out the door anyway.
"Who's gonna clean up all this mess?!"
Madeline looked down at the table and found a strange looking letter. She picked it up and read it to herself.
Dear Madeline,
We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice four hours of our Saturday for not getting along with each other. That was wrong of us. But we think you're crazy to keep us confined in your fancy home so we can get to know one another. We are who we are. In the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain and an athlete and a shrinking violet and a metrosexual and a karate-chopping poet. Does that solve the problem?
Sincerely yours,
The Boyfriend Club
Madeline flipped over the letter and laid eyes on an attractive woman in a suggestive fireman uniform holding a fire-hose between her legs. Madeline yelped and dropped the letter.
"I'm so elated that you and the guys are getting along," Debra said to Kyle as they walked towards his car.
"Yeah, it was bound to happen," Kyle said, putting on his sunglasses with one hand.
"Did you try to win them over with your tough-guy facade?"
"A little bit."
"I guess it didn't work, did it?"
"No, it did not."
"Good. You're better when you're sweet."
"Thank you, babe. Ooh, a butterfly." He pointed at the exotic insect in the air.
"Quick, catch it!"
Kyle reached for the butterfly and clenched his fist.
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